My thoughts about Facebook

see Thursday Treadmill Treats My thoughts about Facebook

see Lately I’ve have had a lot of changes in my life and because I write this blog everyone knows all about my life. I have to tell you some of the responses have brought me to tears, the support and the love I have received on Facebook is overwhelming and I truly appreciate it.

When I got approved for my new home and finally went to closing so many of you reached out to me, telling me how proud you were of me and how far I’ve come. For someone who for so many years was put down and belittled, telling me I could never do anything on my own, your words were music to my ears, as some times I still hear his words in my head. Yes, I really did this, all by myself, all of it the remodeling, the moving, all of it was me and me alone.

I have reconnected with so many old friends that I have lost touch with and without this platform would likely have never found again. I reconnect with my first best friend Cookie, through her cousin on here. My dear cousin Carol, my bestie, Jill and many high school friends I have missed so much.
I don’t have anyone who isn’t my friend or family on my Facebook page, I don’t need a million people on my page just the important ones.

I also keep up with family that is spread out all over the county, I get to see their kids and grandkids, I am still part of their lives even though we don’t get to see each other often.
This is a great thing, you can give support and encouragement to someone, you can be happy for their victories and feel sorrow for their pain. You can make them laugh and laugh when your down just by seeing their posts.

It can make you feel less alone when you think no one understands, you can stand up for your beliefs with others and realize that everyone had their own opinion and that’s cool too.

People talk bad about Facebook, they say it’s a breeding ground for cheating yeah, because no one cheated before Facebook, get real!
Yes, you can find more people but you can do that online as well. You don’t want to know everyone’s on goings, okay don’t read them, people you don’t like are on there, that is what a unfriend button is for, use it.

For me Facebook is a community of people you chose to be in your life, to share your good times and have support for the not so good times. To keep in contact with loved ones and find long lost friends. It is a platform for great things if you chose to use it that way.
Look I write my blog on here every day and I actually help encourage people with my words. How amazing is that?

So today my friends, use Facebook like you would real life, if you want to catch up with someone go for it,  if there is a negative person, cut them out of your life, if you don’t want to hear someone’s crap, block them, it’s easy but it all starts with you.

To all my Facebook friends and family I want you to know how much I appreciate your love and support, thanks for always being there for me, I love you all.


The big move

Hump day Treadmill Treats

The big move…

So today’s the day..finally after all these months of getting financed, all the paperwork, holding my breath, waiting for an answer, getting approved, the closing and a month of crazy remodeling, today is the big day of finally moving in to my new home.

Of coarse nothing goes as planned when you are doing this and I planned to move in when  everything was completely done….well not so much, it’s almost done, but definitely not completely done that’s for sure.

But ready or not here we come!
I am over tired, there is not a muscle that doesn’t hurt,  I haven’t been to the gym in two weeks yet I am still up at 5 am working on the new house or packing the old. I drop into my bed at 10 or 11 exhausted. I have to give props to service families to have to move every few years, it must really suck! But yet they do it.

My plan was to stay in this house until my little one goes to college then move to the beach. That’s 3 years from now and I am already dreading it.

I will give this home thanks and its final a due today, as this home was my first taste of freedom I had experienced in 24 years. This home has given me wonderful memories over the past year.
I remember moving in with help from all of my friends and church family, I remember my first night here with a million boxes and no furniture sitting on a mattress on the floor eating Chinese food out of the carton with Dalllas.

I remember searching for a whole house full of furniture and painstakingly refinishing it all, all within a budget of 3000.00.
I remember doing a triathlon the first week I moved in, I was thinking if I could do this, I can do anything in life, I got this.
Our first Christmas in 24 years with a huge tree was here, I invited who I wanted an though it wasn’t 30 people like in years past, it was my friends and family and I was truly happy  and grateful.

I fell in love and got my heart broken here, I learn many lessons here about myself, I finished my book here, I had many laughs and great times with my girls here and we grew closer in this home.
I’ve had friends stay with me from all over the country who never wanted to visit before (I wonder why lol)
I had my dreams come true here and I have become a strong, independent women here and taught my girls the same lessons.
Yes, this house will always hold special memories for me as it gave me a place to grow, to realize who I am and have faith in myself. I am incredibly grateful for this last year.

Today will start a new chapter in my life with new memories that will last a lifetime and again I am grateful of all of God’s grace on my life.

So today my friends don’t be afraid to start over, to take that chance, to completely shake your life upside down because in doing so you realized what your made of and what you never thought possible could actually come true. I am living proof of that …

Living through the mess

Tuesday Treadmill Treats

Living through the mess

Being a professional organizer it’s been really hard living through the mess of moving and remodeling. I am a neat freak and like everything in its place, this makes me want to scream! But there is nothing you can do but pray you won’t go crazy and do one day at a time.

You feel unstable, everything is half complete and you have no control of the situation as you are in the mercy of contractors, painters and tile people and that my friends sucks!

My tile guy Joe Piazza took longer than expected because of the holiday’s but he was worth it, he did an unbelievable job and was an incredible help to me as well. 754-224-0209 He has a waiting list get on it now!

The plumber ripped me off, Mike Green aka “Mr.Service” and then still didn’t do the job right, a very expensive lesson learned for me. My painter then had another job and has left me unfinished until everything else  is done and my kitchen guy must think because I am a women I must be dumb as I am fighting with him about what a built-in refrigerator looks like.

Yesterday alone, Lowe’s couldn’t install the dishwasher because of the job the plumber was supposed to do but yet again didn’t do. The dryer couldn’t fit in the space where it was supposed to go and had to be sent back, the electrician didn’t finish his job and the cabinet guy is fighting with me that 4 inches of the refrigerator showing is a built-in I paid extra for is normal!! Wtf !!

I am supposed to move in in two days and I have no dishwasher, no dryer, no refrigerator, my kitchen is half done as well as my painting  and I want to scream and did yesterday.

I am beyond exhausted, doing so much of the work myself, I am drained emotionally, physically and mentally besides my wallet.

But if you know me I have to look on the bright side of everything so with that being said I am almost all packed and all the boxes are already at the new house unpacked thanks to my amazing friends and family.  My girlfriend Kelly’s husband Mark, the contactor is still there doing stuff for me, God bless them both for all the help.
  Pines Total Construction
Call him he’s the best!
And in a few days I will be living in my, I never thought this could happen, definitely a God miracle home. So I feel blessed.

Yes, in a few months this will all be a thing of the past and I will look back and laugh…I hope !
In the meantime I will smile and pray some more that I can move into a working house in 2 days until then I will keep treaking  along knowing the end is in sight.

So today my friends my advice to you is buy a house already done, ok  if you truly want to go through this know this before you start:

1- Nothing will ever get done on your time frame.

2-You have to know your prices, do research, know what your getting into.

3- Get everything in writing and don’t think because they go to church that, that makes them unscrupulous or that you can trust everyone.

4- Have a back up plan, see lesson 1.

5- Have a sense of humor, it’s all to overwhelming, you have to laugh otherwise you will cry.

These are my tips for surviving a remodel and moving, I hoped these helped now excuse me I need to reread this myself.

Tips for the online dater

Tgif  Treadmill Treats

Tips for the online dater

This week I talked a lot about wishing I had someone in my life, but to find someone you first must kiss a lot of frogs…
so to speak. In today’s world it’s online dating, a truly scary thing to do after not dating for 24 years.

But I have done it as I am not going to find Mr Perfect for me knocking at my door. (Well my new neighbor is cute and single…) okay generally not knocking on my door.

I have some tips for all of the guys out there that are also new to this dating scene, very important tips from a women’s point of view.

1. Put up a picture
In my experience guys without pictures in this day and age are married period!

2. Put up more than one picture and a full body picture
Yes you can look really good in one picture, the right angle, the right light but in others you look like a completely different person. Body shots, sorry everyone has a type I like in shape guys, you don’t have to be Mr. Universe but you have to be able to see your toes. I am active, I want a active guy.

3. I don’t need to see pictures of what you looked liked 30 years ago, yes, you were a football star in high school, your not anymore, we all looked better then, let it go.

4. I don’t want to see pictures of your animals, if you happen to  have a great picture of yourself holding your dog, fine but ten pictures of your dog, not so much, I am not dating your dog.

5. I am not interested in what you have.
No need to put up pictures of your motorcycle, boat, big house or fancy car, not impressed been there done that, money definitely does not make a man. (And then you have the nerve to call us gold diggers!)

6. Don’t lie about what you like and don’t like.
We eventually will meet and talk and you can’t keep up lies and why would you want to? Be you..

7. Catfishing…what is with that? Why pretend to be someone your not, for what reason? Get a life and stop messing with others.

8. Don’t say you want a relationship when all through your profile your talking about clubbing and sex, be real if your just looking to hook up, say it!

9. Be specific in what you want, do you want kids, what’s your deal breakers,smoking ect.. skinny, chunky, tall, short, so we know what your looking for and not waste time.

10. Say something about yourself, likes, hobbies, what your looking for. Men with a blank profile to me are blank men, boring…I know it’s not easy talking about yourself, ask a friend to help you, while your at it ask them to take pictures of you too!

Maybe my men readers will give me some tips on how we women can make our profiles better. I am always open to change…

So today my friends, it’s a new world out there, we must adapt to changing times and to do so we must be open to change.

Mr perfect for me part 2

Thursday Treadmill Treats

Mr.Perfect for me part 2

Yesterday I wrote about the stress of remodeling and moving and how I would love to find someone to share this and my life with. When I wrote a blog some time ago someone wrote there is no perfect man, I replied ” I am not looking for perfect, just perfect for me”

I know some of my girlfriends  have a long list of criteria…he has to be 6’0-6’3, between the ages of 45-50, make over 100k a year, must be professional, kids grown, not in debt, house has to be over 4000 square feet…yada,yada,yada….
I am serious and one thing missing off their list and your done, next….

I am not looking for that but as I’ve gotten older there are some things I will not compromise about, sorry not going to take less.
For me first and foremost you need to believe in God, you need to have a kind heart, you need to be funny  (funny is the new sexy) You need to be able to laugh at yourself, you need to be my partner not my patrol officer , you need a compassionate and giving spirit, you need to be loyal and you need to be grateful for everything in your life.

Not to much to ask, most humans already have these things inside of them so it’s not unrealistic to ask for these things.
But I will NOT under no circumstances put up with cheating, lying, drama of any kind, if your controlling, jealous, hateful, unforgiving, racist, ungrateful, an atheist,
If your fronting to the world or you feel your better than anyone else.

Look I’ve dated these guys before not going back there again,  I don’t need a man in my life, I would like one but not so much so that I will take the first loser because I am afraid of being alone as so many women do.

I value my self worth, I now know I am worthy of being treated like a queen and I will not settle for peasant treatment any longer.
See, I know I will treat my man like the king he is, I will have his back, I will be his biggest cheerleader, I will let him be him, the one God has made and not try to change him, I will trust him, be loyal to him and be the best women I can be to him.
And the only thing I expect in return is the same…not to much to ask for.

So today my friends realize your self worth, know your worthy of a great man, not just a body that fills your bed. Realize the superficial doesn’t last, it’s what your made of that does.
Rewrite your list…and trust that God has your perfect man out there, the man perfect for you.

That’s what friends are for

Tuesday Treadmill Treats
That’s what friends are for…

Recently I bought a house and it needed to be gutted completely. The only things I could salvage was 2 ceiling fans and a garbage disposal, yes seriously!
Everything else I had to buy new, being a single mom, I had no one to help me do anything, to bounce stuff off of or to hold my hand through this process.

You know I don’t sugar coat anything, as I am not Willy  Wonker, I always tell you that, so I will tell you it’s been scary and overwhelming.This has been the first time in 25 years that I have done something like this all on my own.

There are days when problems come up that I think I took on too much, there are nights I can’t sleep worrying about the bills, if I am going to get out of my rental on time, am I going to get more business. Yes, I am human, I really try not to worry and for the most part I don’t but this is a big undertaking and sometimes I slip.

I had the plumber rip me off, very expensive lesson and someone from my own church try to rip me off (just because someone goes to church does not make them holy, leaned  that lesson too!)
But what I really learned was that I have some incredible people in my life. I am blessed with great friends and family, that have been coming to my rescue in the last few weeks.

I have nothing to pay them, yet they are here giving of their time and themselves to help me out and I am so grateful for all their help.
Someone told me that I had always been there for them, that I always give of myself to help others and this is what you get back in return. I never think of that when I do things for others, I do them out of my heart, not expecting anything in return.
This made me cry knowing that I had touched people’s hearts in such a way that they wanted to give back to me.

I am pretty handy and I can do a lot of different things around the house and have been, like disconnecting and pulling out old sinks and toilets, putting together closet systems,
attempting to put down laminate flooring  (which came out okay, thank God for trim) the yard clean up, my back splash and a host of many other small jobs I can tackle.

But I have my limits, I don’t do drywall or electrical or 45 degree cuts and for that I have been relying on my friends for help in those areas.

So today I want to thank  all of my incredible friends  and family that have been here and will  probably continue to be here for a few more weeks to help me out, I could never do this without you and I am truly grateful for it all.

Thank you, wifey Jilly Jill, Griselle, Adrian, Mark and Kelly, Carol and Rick, Dave, Linda, my tile guy Joe, and my new neighbors who have been wonderful. You mean the world to me and I can never repay you except by cooking for you!

So today my friends, be grateful  for your friends because they are the family we chose for ourselves, pick wisely and if you do you will have an amazing family like mine.

Today we celebrate Martin Luther King

Monday Treadmill Treats

Today we celebrate Martin Luther King

I don’t understand why the world is the way it is, why do we not celebrate a person’s accomplishments when they are alive. Why is it that a painter is not truly famous until they die? Or a actor giving kodos for the work until after they are gone?

In everyday life it is the same, we don’t bring flowers to people until after they are dead and can no longer smell them, we don’t tell them how much they mean to us or how great we think they are until it’s too late.

Martin Luther King was a great man, he had an incredible message of peace, he stood up to tell the world that we can all live together, black, white, Indian, Asian, it doesn’t matter what color we are, we are all the same. In a time when the country was most divided, he had the courage to speak his message of hope.

He saw people for people, he didn’t see race or religion and he wasn’t afraid to preach this message. He was an incredible man and humanitarian and his life and words changed the world as everyone saw it.

Yet when he was alive he didn’t have such an impact as when his live was cut short, by a crazed man who didn’t agree with his message of peace.
It was after his death that his words came to mean so much to so many.
His words never changed so why did we hear them after his death? The old saying is true, you never know what you have until it’s gone comes to mind and unfortunately it’s true.

Life is too short, you need to let go of your hate of another human being based on race or religion. We are all the same. We all bleed red, we are all just trying to make it, why must we hate someone who is different from ourselves? Why can’t we celebrate the fact that we are not all the same?

So today my friends, let’s celebrate that fact that we are free, that I am allowed to worship in a church with my black friends, that there is no more segregation, that everyone is equal just like he dreamed about and preached about all those years ago.

Let’s keep his dream alive by telling the people in your life today how much they mean to you and how their words and their life effect yours.
Don’t wait till its too late, change the way you see others, judge them for their hearts, not their color. Except people who are different, be a message of peace. Change the world one message at a time, in doing that we can all keep his message alive.

Determination will get you there

Tgif Treadmill Treats
Determination will get you there

Do you know in a race all runners run? But there can only be one winner.

This year I am determined to do all I have set out to do, I made a commitment to never miss my God moment, I will walk out on faith to challenges that I cannot see how it could possible happen, but yet believing that it will happen.

If you can’t imagine yourself winning, you won’t ,if you not determined about finishing the race, you will give up, if you do not have the faith to believe,it will not happen.

I was talking with someone this week and I told them of a story of someone I knew who had stage 4 cancer. The doctors gave her 3 months to live but she had faith and hope and she told them she was determined  she was going to live. They must have thought she was nuts, stage 4 ,you don’t live.

She believed in miracles, she never gave up,she willed herself better. Two months later when then ran more scans with one month left of the doctors death sentence,she was cured, yup no cancer, all gone. The doctors couldn’t believe it but she believed it, she believed in prayer and she was determined and look where it got her.

My friend asked if I was Tinker bell, yes, I am. I believe.
She said she didn’t believe in miracles, I told her then she would never receive one,you have to believe to receive. ..

Dont sit around day after day saying  poor me, you don’t know what I’ve been through, I am not lucky, there is no way it can change.
Because with thoughts like that it wont,  your telling yourself you will never get better, become successful or change your circumstances, you have no shot at change. It all starts with you and your attitude.
Surrounded yourself with people who influence your life in a positive way. Here are 7 ways to start to change

1. Write a set of goals down:
Write a list, make a vision board, look at it ,envision it.

2 Take action:
Do something to get it started, research it ,talk to others..

3. Be flexible to make changes to your goals:
It’s okay it if doesn’t happen exactly like you see it,  it can be way better than you thought.

4 Over look the distractions:
Focus on the prize.

5.Never quit:
No matter what, keep going.

6.Use life experience to your benefit:
Always ask what can I learn from this?

7. Don’t do it by yourself:
Know that there are others around your supporting your dream.

There are 3 things that will bring you down

1. Negative thoughts
I can never do this..

2.People’s attitude
You will never do that

3.Flashbacks of your past….
You know where you came from, your a loser,you can’t do it, see you tried before. Forget all of that, know you can do anything you set your mind to.

So today my friends you have to be determined to be determined.
Do not leave your destiny in the hands of people….
Do not trust people with your happiness
Change your thoughts,  change your life..

How I became a professional organizer

Thursday Treaadmilll Treats

How I  became a professional organizer

  I was legal assistant for many years, my boss went to jail for embezzlement and the real estate market went belly up.
I was out of work for eight months when my Bishop said do what your passionate about.
Well, I was always organizing friends houses for free, I said to my friends “do people really pay for this?” But I had nothing to lose so I started the business and I tried and tried to get an ad with Groupon and Living Social but with no luck.

When I asked “God, if this is what I am supposed to do send a sign and since I am dumb as rocks, let’s make it clear, have either one of those companies call and accept me. The next day the phone rang and it was Groupon!  Saying they wanted to run my ad! I can’t make this up!

But because I am human and hard headed, I needed yet another sign, three days later at church, there was a women who was sitting next to me, she was crying, I put my arm around her and offer her a tissue. After service she said she was visiting from the Bahamas and she was a minister, she told me God told her to come here today and he wanted me to know not to worry that this business I was starting,that it was going to successful, just to believe and have faith. I didn’t know this women, how could she possibly know I was starting this business, that I was praying for that very thing that night, I went into the ugly cry, this was definitely a sign.

But as I said before sometimes I am dumb as rocks and when 3 days later the phone rang with a job I had applied for a month before, a real paying job with real money every week. I struggled with it because there were all these signs I asked for and I knew this was what I should and wanted to be doing yet here was this nicely paying job….I had faith but I just about  to get divorced and needed to make sure I had a steady income so I took the job.

The next day the doctor called and told me bad news about my recent tests, they didn’t like what they saw and told me I needed more tests, she said there was a lump in my lipnoids, now coming from a family of breast  cancer, I was scared.
I started the new job the following day, at the end of the day of me sitting there taking notes they told me they didn’t have time to train me and that they were sorry. What? I was fired on my first day? Are you frigging kidding me?

I went home crushed, I cried and I prayed and then the next day my phone starting ringing and there were all these clients for my new business. I knew God had closed one door to open another, since I wasn’t  getting it, he did it for me.
It has now been 2 years, doing what I love to do,yes there have been some tough times but he has always provided for me and I am happy doing what I love.

By the way, after a host of testing, the lump they found had disappeared, the doctors were dumbfounded but I wasn’t I knew all that was possible if you believe.

So my friends I am here to tell you to take a leap of faith, watch for the signs and then listen, you will never know until you try… and even if you fall, get back up, learn the lessons you needed to learn and try again. Do what your passionate about and it will never feel like work.
Today take that chance on you, your worth it.

Does my happiness make you sick?

Hump day Treadmill Treats

Does my happiness make you sick?

I realized that some people might get sick of my happiness, they might think “Why the hell is she always happy and smiling, life sucks, no one should be that happy, I hate my job, I have no one in my life, or my relationship sucks, my kids are not doing the right thing, I have to take care of my parents, my bills are over do, what the hell are you so happy about!!”

Do you not think I don’t have bills? A job that gets stressful? Kids that make me want to pull my hair out? A relationship, oh please don’t even let me go there! But I don’t chose to not look at all of the negative in my life , I chose to be grateful, I chose not to worry about what I can’t change.

I am happy because I know who I am, I love myself and I all of the small meaningless things in life are just that small and meaningless, thats all, I will never again let any of that effect my life or happiness.

I don’t take one day, one second for granted, it is a gift to me and I kniw that, I want to be present in every moment.There is a song called its good to be alive that is how I feel each and every day. I don’t understand how everyone doesn’t feel this way, God woke you up , you are healthy, you have a job, you drove there today, you have food, gas, friends doesn’t that alone make you want to smile?

We take everything way to serious in this life, we are so worried about what others will think, our status, what we have, how much money we make, that we are killing ourselves trying to keep up, what you dont see is that millionaire that has no true friends, that is lonely and cries at night, that women in church in the fancy dress and purse that cant sleep at night because the bills are past due and she cant pay them, that person with the fancy car at work that parks it 3 blocks away because they are trying to reposs it, no you only see what they show to the world.

I know I no longer need “things” to make me “happy” I get true peace and joy just from being alive! Just from being one with God and the universe, just from spending time with my loved ones or by myself, there is a inner happiness that I can’t keep hidden, it pours over and out of me.

Yes, this is why I sing at the gym at 5:30 am or I dance in the street, that I have a smile on my face all day or a kind word for someone, I am happy and I want to share it with the world.

So today my friends, I have to tell you sorry in advance I am going to make you sick, probably each and every time you see me and I am not sorry! I am hoping that I may rub off on some of you and that you may be happy and grateful just for being alive today. People life is too short, be happy!