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source url Lifting someone up
go to link I write this blog to try to inspire others, to let people know that no matter how bad it seems, to be grateful as it could have been worse.
I am brutally honest, I let people see me at my best and at my worst and I never sugar coat anything.
I am also a friend to the end and would do anything for my friends but there comes a point when you must realize that you can’t help others who don’t want to help themselves.
Sometimes even if you have the best intentions, you can’t help and you have to walk away….
I wrote about this last week, about how it’s far and few that I cut someone out of my life but sometimes you have no choice and this is one of those unfortunate times.
I have been trying to help a friend who has a terrible illness see that her mental health effects her physical health, that I was worried about her and all the morbid post she had been posting, she seemed almost suicidal with the things she was saying. I reached out to let her know that yes it may seem dark now but to hold on, that maybe if she believed, if she changed her attitude, her situation would become better. That maybe she needed to talk to someone.
Well she ripped into me telling me I didn’t care about her, that I knew nothing of her disease, that I was a lousy friend and on and on.
I told her about another one of our friends who has a gamut of horrible diseases and is still the most positive person I know. She then twisted my words and put it out there that I was unsympathetic to her and her disease to all of “her” friends who in return also bashed me.
Look, I know who I am, I know my friends and family know who I truly am in my heart and soul, they know I would never look down on someone unless I was giving them a hand up. I truly wanted to help, but you can’t force help on someone even if you have the best intentions.
She will go on posting and feeling oh poor me, my life sucks, no one gets it, because she is getting something out of it, she is not willing to try something new and she is comfortable in the victim role.
I get it nothing changes when nothing changes…I can no longer try to help and get beat up for my efforts, so I am walking away… I am sorry I can’t do more, sorry she saw my help as a attack against her and truly sorry I am losing a friend but I will walk away knowing I have tried on many occasions to try to help and that’s all I can do…
So today my friends know when you did the best you could, when you reached out time and time again, you just can’t help someone who doesn’t want your help or refuses to change. Close the door and walk and walk away, you can’t lift everyone up….
“Be the change you want to see”
Coming soon..look for my new book The blessing in disguise
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